The Word on Heavenly Families

God designed the family before it existed. He has determined our roles and responsibilities in order to help us be the people He designed us to be. To fulfil God’s purposes we must believe His promises and obey His commands. Obedience is hard, it can only be accomplished when God empowers us to obey. At the heart of God’s teaching on family lies the profound principle of the Gospel. Obedience comes by believing, and that obedience brings about God’s purpose for us.

Scripture

Ephesians 6:1-4 ESV Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Bible Study Questions

God’s role and responsibility for children

For heavenly families to function as God designed we must accept and pursue the roles and responsibilities that God has designed for us. What is the particular role and responsibility of children, and in what ways is it similar and different to the role and of wives mentioned previously in Ephesians 5?

Ephesians 6:1 ESV Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.*

Ephesians 5:22-24 ESV Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

Colossians 3:18-20 ESV Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. 20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

God's Commandment

The reason for children obeying their parents is that it is right because God commands an attitude of respect and reverence for parents. Why is it not enough for children to only obey their parents, what else should they do, and how does this influence obedience?

Ephesians 6:2a ESV “Honor your father and mother”

Matthew 15:3-6 ESV He answered them, “And why do you break the commandment of God for the sake of your tradition? 4 For God commanded, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘Whoever reviles father or mother must surely die.’ 5 But you say, ‘If anyone tells his father or his mother, “What you would have gained from me is given to God,” 6 he need not honor his father.’ So for the sake of your tradition you have made void the word of God.*

The Heart of the matter, believe then obey

The reference to the fifth Commandment is interrupted by a short but powerful observation. It emphasises a principle in Scripture that shows that God’s promises and commandments are related. How are the commandments and promises of God related?

Ephesians 6:2b ESV (this is the first commandment with a promise)

2 Corinthians 1:20 ESV For all the promises of God find their Yes in him. That is why it is through him that we utter our Amen to God for his glory.

John 6:28-29 ESV Then they said to him, “What must we do, to be doing the works of God?” 29 Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.”

God's Promises

The promise that accompanies the fifth commandment is primarily directed at the people of Israel and their establishment in God’s Promised land. The promise is also a warning to them and to us, of what will happen when our children do not honour their parents. How does this warning relate to the conditions which accompany the end times?

Ephesians 6:3 ESV “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

2 Timothy 3:2 ESV For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy,

Romans 1:28-31 ESV And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. 29 They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31 foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless.

God’s role and responsibility for parents

While parents are given authority over children, this authority is meant to administer love and to nurture children into a faithful loving and obedient relationship with God. What are parents to do, and not to do for their children?

Ephesians 6:4 ESV Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Colossians 3:21 ESV Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged

Proverbs 13:24 ESV Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.

The Word of God

The Bible is God’s Word, is that is true, then anything it reveals about God is actually God revealing Himself to us. God’s instructions and promises reveal God to us. Anything it reveals about us, is God revealing things that we need to know about ourselves. When we see God and ourselves revealed we see our need for Jesus revealed. How do the following Scriptures reveal God, ourselves and the Lord Jesus Christ?

2 Timothy 3:16-17 ESV All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

Hebrews 4:12-13 ESV For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13 And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.

Luke 24:25-27 ESV And he said to them, “O foolish ones, and slow of heart to believe all that the prophets have spoken! 26 Was it not necessary that the Christ should suffer these things and enter into his glory?” 27 And beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, he interpreted to them in all the Scriptures the things concerning himself.

Faith and Works, Promises and Commandments

Eternal life is not merely a reward to be had, but rather our relationship with God perfected. When we believe the promises of God, we’re empowered to obey His commandments. What happens to our relationship with God when we believe His promises, and obey His commandments?

James 2:17-18 ESV So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. 18 But someone will say, “You have faith and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works.

Revelation 14:12-13 ESV Here is a call for the endurance of the saints, those who keep the commandments of God and their faith in Jesus. 13 And I heard a voice from heaven saying, “Write this: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on.” “Blessed indeed,” says the Spirit, “that they may rest from their labors, for their deeds follow them!”

John 17:3 ESV And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.